——————————————————————

Ahh…hnn…

The bed creaked and the smell of sex wafted in the air.

I love you.

Words you loved to hear bubbled out from his mouth. The suction of your skin in between his teeth almost send you to paradise, just almost, you needed more. You needed him to ignite the fire in you to the highest level.

More

You groaned as he squeezed your arousal, hard enough to keep you aroused, light enough to not hurt you.

Yoochun…

You moaned his name over and over again, loving every moment when his lips brushed pass your own, when he pulled your face closer to him gently and invited you in for a kiss. You gasped when you felt a finger circling around the sensitive hole, when was it lubricated, you didn’t know, the fire in the pit of your stomach was engulfing you as a mixture of pain and pleasure took over your euphoric body, that said finger has entered you.

Ahh!

You cried out as you felt the second finger, the third only stretched you even more.

Stop teasing me.

You choked as both your arousal brushed past each other, without warning, the three fingers vanished, leaving you insane with the sudden emptiness. He was quick, before you knew it, he already had you engulfed in his warm cavern, bringing you to the next level of heaven.

Argh!

You sputtered when he refused to allow you to cum, he was squeezing you hardly, no longer the gentle Yoochun, but then again, this was the other side of him you had long learned to love.

You ready baby?

He whispered huskily, teasingly. You moaned, your only reply.

Tell me Junsu, I want to hear it from you.

You shook your head, briefly seeing your red and wanton face reflecting in his loving gaze.

Tell me Junsu, or you won’t get what you want.

That did it, you wanted him in you, you needed him in you.

I want you inside me Yoochun, I want you…

As soon as you choked out the last sentence, he had already thrust in you, his vigorous movement caused the bed to move from its position, and for one moment, you were afraid that the neighbor would complain, as if reading your mind, he came up to you and bit your earlobe, meanwhile whispering sweet nothings.

Neighbors be damned.

You heard him say as he thrust into you again and again, rejuvenating your soul, renewing your love. Suddenly, he stopped, a playful smirk appeared on his beautifully sculpted face. He flipped you so that he was directly underneath your hold.

Ride me Junsu, show me what you can do.

You moaned again when the slight movement caused his tip to hit your prostrate, feverishly, you did as you were told, bouncing up and down as if for your dear life, each time, groans of satisfaction could be heard from the both of you. You felt his hands on your waist, squeezing you hardly, and though it hurt, you still enjoyed it, you felt his tongue drawing circles on your taut nipples, you only purred in reply.

The dolphin turning into a cat?

Shut up.

You hissed, feeling your climax edging nearer and nearer, he grabbed your waist and pulled you down, stopping all movements, you wanted to pry him away, you wanted to experience the release you had been anticipating, but why does he have to stop now?

Yoochun!

You wanted to whine, but it turned out to be futile as he grabbed your arousal and pumped his free hand up and down your length.

Ahh!…hnn…

Let’s cum together.

He whispered into your ear, using the bedroom voice he knew you loved so much. You nodded your head, mouth sucking on his lips with ecstasy, tongue trying to seek an entrance into the wet cavern, as expected, he allowed you to, grinding into you as he did so, his hand never leaving your length. His hold on you tightened and you groaned, he was now rubbing your pre-cum around the tip of your head, fingering the slit, you couldn’t take it any longer, you were ready to beg if he was still going to stop you.

Now!

He groaned as your seeds spurted messily between yours and his stomach and you felt his leaving a trail of warm in your asshole.

Yoochun…Yoochun

You called out his name tiredly, whispering over and over again. He slid out of you, pulling you into his wet embrace,

I love you Junsu, I really, really do.

A soft feathery kiss on your hair as he drifted off to another world where he would be sure to dream about the both of you.

I love you too.

You whispered, snuggling deeper into his embrace, as if his body was made to accommodate you. Kim Junsu just love nights like this.

Run.

The alarm in your head lighted up and the siren rang piercingly in your mind.

But to where?

You asked yourself, you are trapped, there was no escape, you could do nothing. The burning sensation of your desperate lungs, your heart pumping so much faster than usual with fear and anxiety, and your legs, they were all persuading you to give in.

But you can’t.

If you don’t run now, your survival rate would drop to almost zero, you had to live! Quickly, you hid behind one of the walls in the guest room. Her shadow frightened you, she was holding a knife, probably the weapon she thought would keep you by her side forever. Her hair that entices you in the past blew softly in the night breeze. You shuddered, now, she was the crazy lioness, and you? You were just her helpless prey.

You scolded yourself for being so stupid, you should have sensed the danger when every single person in the house disappeared, you should not have drank the drugged wine, you should have left before you could even stumble about the dead bodies of people whom had taken great care of you, and deep inside, you were afraid, afraid that he would be in the pile of bloody corpses.

“JaeJoong ssi.”

Her light whispered caused you to freeze, she knew, she set the trap, and once again, you foolishly walked into it.

But.

She doesn’t know what you would do, she didn’t know that as weak as your body may be, desperation could drive a man to do anything, even to the extent of killing another. Sweat dripping down your pale face, you waited for her to come, and came she did.

“Didn’t I tell you?” she whispered again, the knife swinging dangerously in her hand, it was hurting her, and yet, she didn’t feel anything.

“We… are inseparable.”

Your heart skipped a beat as she neared you. You were stupid, a fool to play around with a mad woman. Her face entered your vision and so did the knife. One step, two step, you held your breath as a perverse smile lit up her once angel-looking face under the moonlight.

Revelation hit you hard and fast like a speeding train. A smile unlike hers, graced your face, it was a gentle but firm one. The knife, it may be sharp, it may be frightening, but you are a man, as weak as your body was, you are supposed to be strong. You stood up and walked slowly towards her, trying to keep her at her end of her tether. She did not move back, neither did she stop smiling.

Then, you pounced.

You didn’t know how it happened. You didn’t think where the sudden courage came from.

Was it because of the desperate need to survive?

Was it because you felt the need to fight the last fight?

Or maybe, just maybe, it was because of him.

You felt the world stopping as the knife plunges into your stomach. As she started dragging you out of the door way, flashbacks started filling mind, how she had call you every single minute, how she had stalked you, how she had became paranoid and her sudden erratic behaviors.

But there were happy memories too, memories of you and him.

As your eyes closed slowly, you felt her dropping the grip on your leg, you heard the knife dropping to the cold marble floor,

clang

that horrible sound it made.

You were drenched in your own blood, every movement made you wince in great pain at your wounded body, but you did not care, all you knew was, he was here, he had lived, he had placed a stop to everything.

Yunho, your life, he was here.

“It’s alright baby.”

He whispered as he lifted you gently into his arms, you hooked your arms around his neck as if for your dear life and the both of you walked out of the horror alive, police cars and ambulance surrounded the neighborhood, sirens pierced through the night, but you didn’t care, even when your eyes closed ever so slowly, they did not leave his beautiful face, the face of your angel,

“she would never hurt you again.”

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Comments are appreciated!!! ^^

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[He loves me, he loves me not...]

The church’s door slammed opened and you saw him turning around, the smile on his face completely wiped off. The wedding band froze in his hand and you forced yourself to look him in the eyes.

Silence.

One step, two step.

The resounding echoes was painful to listen, each sound made was like needles, pricking your heart, filling it with pain, but the next, the pain was gone and all that was left was emptiness. Park Yoochun was a fool, you are a fool to fall in love with this man, this supposed angel. “Why?” you mumbled as you neared him, the woman standing by him was beautiful, but that cruel smirk on her face told you everything, the things you need to know, his betrayal, your dead heart.

As your hand stretched to reach him, so close to touch him, you felt your own world spinning like an out of control merry-go-round, every dreams you had turned into nightmares and your sight was blinded by darkness, when would you wake up? You really didn’t know…

[I want to turn away, but you kept me hanging.]

They knocked on your bedroom door, you ignored them.

They barged into your enclosed world, but it’s alright.

They stared into the windows of your broken soul, never mind, they won’t see a thing.

Or maybe yes, perhaps the tears falling down your red weary eyes, perhaps the occasional sobs you released, perhaps the silent cries for him. But like a shattered mirror, as much as they tried to paste you back, those scars, those hurts, they would be there forever, they would be there for the world to see. Park Yoochun is dead, you are dead, but they just didn’t know. The door closed silently and you no longer hear their voices, good, it’s better to leave you alone. “Yoochun.” A soft feathery whisper, it was unbelievable that you could still be broken, with shaky hands, you reached up to cover your ears, his voice hurt you, his face blinds you, you want to hide, to never come out, but he just wouldn’t leave.

“Yoochun.” He grabbed your hands in his, preventing it to travel up again. Fine, let him have his way then, you wouldn’t give a damn anyway. “I’m sorry.” His apologies had you crying in his arms, the tears never stopping, it hurts, you really want to tell him, but Park Yoochun was strong, this wasn’t you, this wasn’t supposed to happen. “I’m sorry.” There was nothing more you could say.

[A red drop of hope, can I trust you again?]

They found you in there, wet, lifeless and bleeding, there was nothing they could do but to call for the ambulance, all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put you back again, but you just need him, you just need him to be there, even if it hurts you more than anything.

—-

—-

—-

A tear slid down your face, leaving a path of lingering heat, you suppressed those overwhelming sobs as you listened to him cry, he said he loves you, but can you trust him? He said that he had to marry the girl because of his dying father, cliché as it sounded, you want to believe. Then he grabbed your wrapped up hand and planted a kiss, said that such things wouldn’t happen again, the tears you tried so hard to hold back broke free, and just like that, you were back in his arms, sobbing like the broken man you already were.

—-

—-

—-

Lies, you should have known better to believe him. The promises he made, they were like the rusty blade you were holding, stabbing into your heart, sliding across your wrist.

He should be here soon, they should be here soon, but it’s alright, this would be the last he would see of you. Now that pesky Yoochun was gone, Kim Junsu could live his happily ever after without any hindrance. You smiled brokenly, and with the last bit of your heart, you downed the bottle of pill as if it was wine, then, you waited.

The door was knocked down as you felt your heavy eyelids closing, you captured a glimpse of the man you spent your entire life loving and you knew that despite the pain, there wasn’t any regrets. He held your hand once again, he planted a kiss on the very same spot, but this time, you wouldn’t live for him already, the reason to live has already faded.

[Baby I'm sorry, in loving memories.]

He touched the ring hanging around his neck as his fingers felt the freshly inscribed words on the tomb.

Kim Junsu was a murderer, he had single handedly killed the only man he had ever loved, he had drove him to the point of no return.

He could still remember his cold hand leaving his warm hold.

He could still remember the empty bottle of sleeping pills.

He could still remember his angelic face even at the brink of death.

The tears adorning his eyes. Park Yoochun had suffered so much for him, and yet, he couldn’t do anything.

“I really love you.” His last words resounded in his mind, even when he was dying, the need to let him know, it was still his top priority.

“Don’t worry my love.” He whispered, pressing a kiss on the cold slab of marble, “I’m coming right after you.”

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Comments are appreciated!!! ^^

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[No, I don't wanna cry.]

The frame sat comfortably in your hands, the sun reflected in the everyday-polished glass, looking up momentarily, you smiled and reached over to touch his unconscious face.

He was suffering, and though you knew it, you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it

F L A S H B A C K

“JaeJoong, would you hate me if I ever leave you?” you heard him whispered into your hair, thinking that it was just a joke, just a hypothetical question that would never happen, you giggled and brushed it aside,

“Nope, I’ll be relief, because I wouldn’t have to cook for you anymore.”

E N D

How you wished that you had never said that, but it was too late already, isn’t it?

You couldn’t turn back time, you couldn’t change anything already. Just like that sleeping face in front of you, you couldn’t make him wake up no matter how hard you try, you couldn’t make all his pain go away.

Ironic isn’t it? How one moment he’s right by your side but the next, he was on the ground, trembling, shivering and in pain and you could do nothing.

It’s a cruel game fate loves to play, but why him?

Why couldn’t it be you?

F L A S H B A C K

“Yunho!” you shouted in anxiety as you see him grabbing the sheets, shaking violently in the middle of the night. His face was screwed up and he was in pain, quickly, you pulled him into your embrace and opened the drawer where you took out a packet of painkiller.

“Here” you whispered gently, placing a pill into his mouth and helping him drink some water. He calmed down considerably and you release the breath you had been holding.

You didn’t ask what had happened, instead, you just let him stay in your arms, rocking him into a peaceful sleep.

E N D

Those nights had scared you endlessly, the first time you saw it, you already knew there would be many more coming, but you just couldn’t built up the courage to ask, you were afraid that everything would come to an end when he told you the truth, you were, afraid of the truth.

———————————

[I promise you love, no more pain, no more sorrow...]

You placed the frame back to its rightful place, it’s a picture that fills your heart with love and memories whenever you look at it, but then again, memories were what built your hopes up only to have it crushing down.

Sometimes, when the going gets tough and you got desperate, that thick blanket of you and him covers you, suffocates you, and for that one moment, you really wished that you hadn’t met him.

F L A S H B A C K

“Isn’t this nice?” you asked, showing him the couple ring you had chosen.

Silence, he didn’t reply. You turned around, heart beating furiously, there he was on the cold marble ground, shaking and trembling, only the white of his eyes was seen.

You threw the ring onto the glass table and knelt down to his eyes, “Call the ambulance!” you yelled, while trying to keep him under control,

“Yunho…Yunho.”

You mumbled, grabbing his cold hands into yours, a few minutes later, they placed him onto the stretcher, and everything was a blur, a colorful video being fast forward.

————

“There’s a tumor in his brain.” You stared at the doctor, deep inside, you really wanted to scream and shout and tell him that he was wrong, but you knew that it was impossible, you knew that he was right.

“Is there anything? Like a surgery or something?” you whispered, hoping that, he could still be save and at the end of the day, the both of you would still be together, laughing and joking around like always.

“I’m sorry, but I won’t recommend a surgery, the tumor is too near the vital parts of his brain, the percentage of him staying in the comatose state is very high, he may never wake up.”

You didn’t know how long you stood there, you didn’t know when the tears fell and you didn’t know if your heart was broken or was it falling apart.

Time stood still and so did you, pain, it was all you could feel.

E N D

The machine beeped, knocking you out from your thoughts, quickly but calmly, you called for the doctor,

he gibbered nonsense, you blocked them out, he gave you options, you blocked those out too, all you could see was that peaceful face lying on the bed, all you could hear was his pain,

“I’ll do it.”

You whispered, a broken smile on your face, your hand reached towards the button that would end his life your life, and without a hesitation, you pressed it.

Time stood still once again, you felt his heart stopped beating under your palm, the doctor left you be.

As the tears slid down your face, you gave him one last kiss,

“and now my love, I could only stare at this picture of you, this picture of us.”

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Comments are appreciated!!! ^^

——————

Blood

He stared at him in horror as the tears welled up in his eyes. Why was there blood? He didn’t know.

Nobody told him anything, nobody tells him to let go.

“What is wrong Junsu?” he asked, taking small wary steps towards the retreating man.

He lunged forward and grabbed his shoulder, holding him absolutely still, Junsu, seeing that there was no more hiding stared straight into his glassy orbs,

“it’s Pneumonic plague.”

He felt his legs gave way as he landed onto the ground, of all people, why must it be him?
=
A lullaby so soothing.
I don’t want it to be the last time hearing it.
=
“Treatment?” he whispered, his fingers brushing the beautiful soft hair of the man lying on his laps.

“It’s too late for that already.”

A sharp intake of breath, he wasn’t ready, not at all, but he had to be brave, for him, for Junsu.

“How did you get it?” he asked the inevitable, the dreaded question he wished to know, he needed to know.

“I was most probably infected.”

A tear drop slid down his face, infected, perhaps it was from him, from that incident,

“it’s me isn’t it? You got it from me didn’t you?”

A nod, it was all it took for a grown man to break down, a fault, it was all his fault.

———————-

“Sing me a song Yoochun.”

He coughed, feeling the blood rising up in his throat again, threatening to release itself from the suffocating hold.

He opened his mouth only to close it soon after. Calming down his overwhelming emotion, he started to sing, and which song could be better than “Love in the Ice”?

Junsu hummed along with the baritone, he wondered what would happen once he was gone,

would Dong Bang Shin Ki remain together, or would the group fall apart?

He wasn’t sure though, but he wished that even if they do, everything, everyone would remain the same, remain unchanged.

Because he knew, even if he died, he would still be part of this group, part of his heart.

The hand on his chest rose up to cover his mouth automatically as it served its purpose,

this time round, his beloved did not fluster like how he did, instead, he suppressed his tears and wiped away the blood on his hand,

“I love you.”

Yoochun whispered brokenly against his hand,

“I know.”

And indeed, he understands.
=
And as you lay there on that cold bed,
I’ll be your only source of warmth.
=

The oxygen mask on his face made him looked even more sick.

It was a joke heaven played on you, how you recovered while he suffered, and every day, seeing him so weak and helpless, you wished that the person suffering was you.

Sometimes, the painful looks on his face often drove crazy thoughts into your brain,

crazy thoughts like ending his painful life for him, but he was struggling to live, so how could you ever bring yourself to do that?

His hand reached out to you, trembling as it suspended in mid air.

You grabbed it, transmitting your warmth to his rather cold one.

You could feel it already, the moment drawing near in a fast-slow pace, it was wrong,

he shouldn’t be dying like that, not from a disease that could have been cured if they paid close attention to him rather than fussing over whether you had taken your antibiotics.

“Yoochun.”

He mouthed, you smiled knowingly, bending forward, you planted a kiss on his lips with your tear coated ones.

As if receiving your permission, his hand became weak and loosened in your tight hold,

his eyes closed with a single tear drop acting as a full stop to his life, to your life.
=
This one last song is dedicated to you my love.
Can you hear it?
=
You stood alone on the big stage, eyes glistening with tears that threatened to fall.

A solo, even after his death, the group stayed together, and silently, everybody knew that this concert was dedicated to him, dedicated to the voice of your heart.

The spotlight was on you, everyone’s eyes were on you, you held the microphone tightly in your hand and counted to three, as the music started drifting into your ears,

you sang, a song written only for him, a melody composed in loving memories.

Throughout the song, your tears flowed down uncontrollably and the audience didn’t know why.

They would probably assume that you are crying for your dead friend,

but no, you are crying for your dead heart.

If time could rewind, you would never compose a requiem in pretext of a song,

instead, you would compose a melody so beautiful that it could not be put into words,

it was his lullaby, you are his lullaby.

————————————————–
How was it? Comments are appreciated!!!^^

The last chapter of [Don't Say Goodbye]

Won’t write any intro today because it’s too much of a hassle.

Comments are very appreciated because i need to know how i fare.

Special Thanks: All my readers who comments and showed me support.

Hope you enjoy this chapter with a cliche ending.

_________________________

“How is he?” he stared at the forlorn man behind the big piece of plastic, Yoochun blinked back the tears of anger and took in a deep breath to calm himself.

“Not going to ask how that precious company of yours is doing?” he asked, voice dripping with unmasked sarcasm,

the man ignored him and turned his head away, “tell me, I’m his father, I have the right to know.”

He chuckled, father? He had never heard a joke so funny, “by coming to visit you, I’ve already wasted 30 minutes of
my life that I could spend with him. He is still lying on that bed Kim Yong Hwan and it’s all because of you. Happy now bastard?”

he placed the phone back onto his holder harshly and slammed the rusty metal gates, it closed,

everything was coming to a closure.

~*~Flashback of dream~*~

“I’m coming back to you soon, be strong, believe.”

The figure faded and everything turned dark.

~*~end~*~

“Will you Junsu?” he asked silently, listening as his voice echoed around the room,

“but I’m tired Su, I’m afraid.”

He swept his bangs away from his closed eyes, planting a soft feathery kiss on his forehead,

“if your heart stops pumping, your breathing labored and your eyes close forever, you know I’ll be joining you soon, I won’t let you be alone, and so don’t be afraid okay?”

“You don’t know what you are talking about.”

He looked up and smiled at Changmin and his two other hyungs, “what brought all of you here?”

JaeJoong walked up to the bed, his hands interlocked with Yunho’s like how he had always remembered when he saw the both of them together.

Inseparable, that was what he had wished he and Junsu would be.

“Yunho and I need not go to work today, we are here to take care of Junsu so that you can go out and take a breather.”

Yoochun shook his head vigorously, objecting to the decision they had made without him,

“you look like shit Chun.” Yunho commented,

“Yeah hyung, you have been running in between Junsu’s company and the hospital, you need to rest!”

he shot the youngest a look and turned back to the bed,

“no, I’m not going to leave him.”

He whispered, feeling Junsu’s warm hand against his cheek.

“Park Yoochun.”

He heard JaeJoong hissing dangerously at him, he ignored the man, eyes seeing only his beloved, he knew Yunho was trying to keep JaeJoong under control, deep in his heart; he really saluted the man whom was once his leader.

He had led them to be one of the most feared, most powerful team in the association, but that was before he had decided to leave with JaeJoong,

that was before Changmin had decided that he couldn’t spend his life killing people regardless of them breaking the law or whatsoever, and he?

He was the only one whom had stayed, if he left, if only he had left.

“Yoochun ah, go home.”

The voice was soft, but firm, he knew Yunho expected the other person to listen to his command, even after leaving, he still could not forget the dominant trait he had in him.

“What if he wakes up?” he asked the impossible,

“we would surely ask you to come back, even if you are swimming in Hawaii.”

Yoochun chuckled softly, “why Hawaii?”

he asked, Yunho shrugged, laughing along side with him.

“Araso.” He said and stood up; he brought Junsu’s hand up to his lips and kissed each finger gently, allowing his touch to linger.

“I’ll come back Junsu, I promise.” The other three men watched as he indulged in his own little world with Junsu.

He was about to turn and leave when he felt a little twitch between his fingers, he froze, ignoring the splitting headache he was experiencing, he looked down and tears filled his eyes,

“Junsu.” He whispered; the other three peered over his tall form to see what had happened, Changmin, seeing that Junsu was slowly opening his eyes, pushed Yoochun aside and stepped in to examine him,

“Yoochun!” JaeJoong shouted as he and Yunho caught him before he landed onto the ground.

Changmin slightly whipped his head around and turned his attention back to Junsu, whose eyes was now wide open and was staring at Yoochun with worry.

“Changmin!” JaeJoong called out, “what, just leave him on the bed, he deserves it!”

Yunho rolled his eyes and with JaeJoong’s help, the both of them managed to place Yoochun on the bed, in a rather awkward position though,

“man, he’s heavy despite the irregular meals he has.” JaeJoong complained to his lover, as if they remembered Junsu, the both of them turned and smiled brightly at him.

“Finally Junsu, you are finally awake.” Junsu took in a deep breath and opened his mouth for the very first time, “Yoochun…Yoochun he…”

Yunho chuckled out loudly as he held JaeJoong in his arms while Changmin grumbled incoherently,

“yah, the first thing you spoke about is that slum? How could you?”

Junsu smiled weakly at Changmin for a second and turned his tired eyes back to the unconscious figure.

“Here” JaeJoong passed a glass of water to Junsu which he took gratefully.

“How long have I been sleeping?” he croaked, “6 months.” Yunho replied,

“You passed your 20th birthday.” Changmin added, Junsu looked around the hospital room and saw that it was in a mess, there was a large luggage in the middle of the room,

clothes, dirty or clean sprawled around on the floor and many other necessities,

“had he been here for the past six months?” JaeJoong nodded his head as he started cleaning the room, couldn’t stand how dirty it was now that Junsu was awake,

“never leaving your side unless it was to go to your company, he even had Changmin bring him food up here.” Once again, he broke his eye contact with the room and looked at him.

As if sensing his longing, Yunho dragged the other two out of the room, leaving the both of them to themselves.

He got down the bed with wobbly legs and struggled with each step to him, by the time he reached his side, he was almost soaked in his own sweat.

“Chunnie.”

He whispered, pain filling his heart as he traced the weary face, had he been this tired when they were together, as far as he could remember, Yoochun was a rather prim and proper man, despite the messy room, he would always shave even if he was very busy or in a rush.

“What happened to you?”

A tear from him dropped onto Yoochun’s face, god, he really missed crying.

“Argh.” He heard a groan and quickly wiped away his tears,

“Junsu, what happened?” he asked as he ignored his headache and pulled the smaller man into his arms.

“Are you hurt? Where’s Changmin? Why isn’t he here?” Yoochun blabbered on and on, scanning Junsu’s body as he did so,

“I’m sad.” He finally choked out, more tears poured down his face,

“sad? Oh god, I’m so sorry! I know I should be the first one to be there when you wake up, but I really didn’t expect myself to fall asleep.”

“You fainted.”

Junsu corrected him; he stopped his rapid talking and took a look at him,

“I’m sorry.” He whispered,

“Oh god I miss you so much!” his voice was muffled as he spoke into his soft hair, pulling him even closer.

“I miss you so much baby.” Junsu could feel his tears soaking his shirt and Yoochun’s wetting his hair.

“Thank you Yoochun.” He whispered into his ears,

“Thank you for not saying goodbye.”

The pair separated and Yoochun planted a soft kiss on his chapped lips, he should be the one saying thank you, but for now, he’ll just leave it as it is.
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The last chapter of [Don't Say Goodbye] will be posted up today, most probably evening in Singapore’s time. Check back here for the latest update!

Fate is cruel, there wasn’t a time where it would play his cruel joke on everybody, there wasn’t a time where he would try to separate people, dissecting humans’ weak relationship and making a fool out of them. He never thought it would be the same though, never thought that there would actually be a second evidence to true love…

_____________

_____________

_____________

………………

Yoochun struggled in his make-shift bed, beads of sweats dripping down his face,
he was dreaming again, and this time, it was the last phase of their nightmares, before everything fade into nothingness…

* * * * *

Silence, if only that could last long, then it would be able to act as a shield for the both of them, then he wouldn’t need to break down and cry, but still…

“Yoochun.”

A soft raspy whisper that hid a lethal weapon behind, its words threatening to crush his heart into tiny pieces,

“let’s break up.”

He said it, after struggling for such a long time, he had finally said it.

Yoochun ignored him; he continued cleaning his wreck body, trying to filtrate out whatever that was hurtful to his heart.

“Yoochun.” He called again, increasing his volume by a tiny notch, “yes?” he asked, keeping his head down, “I said let’s break up.”

A chuckle, painful to their ears, a chuckle that was produced by a broken heart.

“Don’t ask me to kill myself Junsu, don’t be so cruel.”

He knew he sounded weak, pathetic, nothing like the man he should be, but he couldn’t, he was in pain, and he wasn’t about to keep it to himself.

“You may love me now, but a few months later, when you think back to all those events, you…”

he looked up angrily, hot streams of tears flowing down his face, he didn’t wipe them off, why should he? Even a superhero deserves the chance to cry.

“Don’t judge my love Junsu! Don’t make decisions for me! I love you now, I’ll love you forever!”

He threw the wet towel onto the soft carpet, covering his mouth while he sobbed, no embrace, he probably had it all figured out in his head during the moment of silence.

“Chun, I’m dirtied, can’t you see? His germs, his touches, they are everywhere, you would never love or deserve a tainted person like me.”

Neither spoke, he left Junsu’s words hanging in the air, letting in echo in the room, he took a deep breath to calm himself and finally spoke,

“I don’t give a damn Su, I won’t break up with you, I won’t let you have your way!”

he had expected a reply, but none came, instead, he turned and looked over to where Junsu was staring, his eyes wide with unmasked horror.

He sprung up and pounced onto the bastard, they barely exchanged a few fists when he was dragged off him.

“Get the fuck away from me!” he screamed, “I’ll fucking kill him!”

if only he had noticed, if only he had calmed down and look at the picture, he would see how Junsu was backing away as the man approached him with a lecherous smirk, he should have seen how he inched away from the man’s touch.

Yoochun broke free from the guards and chased after Junsu, it was too late, everything was too late, not him, nor the ruthless rapist was able to reach him in time,

one broken soul watched as his fragile body was tossed and knocked down by the speeding vehicle, the other watched the scene with disappointment, disappointment for losing yet another of his “wife”.

He couldn’t remember what happened after he rushed and gathered the bloodied body into his arms,

couldn’t remember when the ambulance arrived, everything was a blur, a fast forwarded movie,

all he knew was Park Yoochun’s heart slipped into a state of nothingness as the man he loved laid in his arms, battered, tattered, and, unconscious.

It was, after all, his entire fault.

* * * * *
He jolted up, breathing harshly, panting and gasping for air. He wiped away his tears and sweats with the back of his hand and frowned at how wet and sticky his shirt was.

Sighing, he stood up unsteadily and entered the small toilet. He splashed cold water onto his face,

“bloody hell.”

He muttered and took off the soaking white cloth, throwing it onto the toilet bowl, he walked out of the toilet and sat down on the chair beside him,

he knew it was impossible for him to fall asleep.

*********************************************************
Why can’t you see the truth, why do I have to repeat myself?
I’m tired Park Yoochun, don’t want to tell you the same thing over and over again.
So this is the last time, he will never ever wake up, that last strand of hope?
The beautiful lie? That so called true love?
They will all end, so don’t hope anymore, fate is cruel, that is fate, that is me.
************************************************

Introduction:

Fate is cruel, there wasn’t a time where it would play his cruel joke on everybody, there wasn’t a time where he would try to separate people, dissecting humans’ weak relationship and making a fool out of them. He never thought it would be the same though, never thought that there would actually be a second evidence to true love…
—————————————————————————————————————————————————

Junsu, I dreamt of you again. This time, we were lying under our favorite tree, feeling the breeze ruffling our hair.

I saw your satisfied smile as you leaned deeper into my embrace, whispering words of love so silently to me.
But do you know that it’s hurting me, to know that you could only smile so freely when he is out of sight.

I want you like that Junsu, I want you in my arms for the rest of my life. I want to hold you close to my heart, listen, it’s pumping for you, it’s thumping for you.

I know that we are barely 19, but I believe that age doesn’t matter, because the moment I saw you, I knew my heart could never fall in love with another again.

Now we are 20 Junsu, you are lying on the bed while I’m walking the earth like a zombie, can you wake up love? Can you smile for me again?

We could go back to the past, we could be happy, if only you would open those mesmerizing eyes again. But I will wait, because, me and you, we belong together.
——————————————————–
Yoochun ruffled his already messy hair, feeling extremely frustrated.

So many weeks had passed, and he was always dreaming about him every night, it was agony,
every dream just made him want to be with him again, not the Junsu lying lifelessly on the bed,
but the Junsu who cheered loudly every time his favorite soccer team scored a goal.

“Junsu ah, please wake up, I need you, I need you so much!” he grabbed his warm hand as two tears slid down his glassy eyes, “I’m sorry my love, please forgive me…”
~*~Flashback~*~
Yoochun looked down at the wooden ground as the older man berated him.

He could feel Junsu trembling, not only because he was half naked, but also because of the fear.

His arm snaked around Junsu’s slender waist, not giving a damn about the man in front of him.

“Get your arm away from him Park Yoochun!” Yoochun pulled him into his embrace, 1) to spite him; 2) Junsu was trembling too vigorously.

He could feel the man seething in anger, heck; he could even swear that he saw smokes coming out from his ears, a very funny sight indeed.

“Park Yoochun.” He hissed softly, the atmosphere tensed even more when he looked up and glared into his eyes, daring him to do anything to him.

“I didn’t leave my son in your care so that you can f.uck his brains out, I employed you so that he wouldn’t escape, you f.ucking got it?”

Yoochun snorted and retorted coldly, “what kind of a father are you? Trapping your son in this disgusting place, planning to sell him off to satisfy your hunger for money, I won’t let you succeed!”

The older man smirked cruelly, he snapped his fingers and almost immediately, another man emerged from under the shadows while a handful of muscular bodyguards grabbed him,

“What the hell! Let me go!”

Yoochun struggled wildly as the men’s grips on him became tighter; he looked at Junsu who was pressed onto the table, looking afraid and vulnerable.

“F.uck you!” he screamed when the younger man’s free hand touched Junsu’s body. “Didn’t I warned you before Yoochun, don’t mess around with me, now I shall let you suffer something much more painful than death, meet Dong Sun my dears, the fiancé of Junsu. Tie him up!”

the men dragged him over to a wooden chair and bound him with thick ropes, anxious for his and Junsu’s safety, also remembering the mission in his hands,

he reached as far as he could into his back pocket and brought out his recorder when the men exited the room, leaving only Junsu’s father, the younger man and him.

He pressed record with the nimblest actions he could afford and watched, eyes widening in horror.

The man’s hands were all over Junsu and his beloved was crying now, desperately asking him to turn away.

Tears brimmed in both of their eyes, he wanted to, but he could not, especially when Junsu’s father was forcing his head up.

“Junsu…” he mumbled, each cries from him killed his heart, he couldn’t take it anymore, not when he had to witness the man he loves crying in pain as he was violated by somebody he don’t even know.

He wanted to turn away, but he couldn’t, because the restrain on him was too tight, just like the chains of metal tugging his heart every time he heard his cries.

He couldn’t move, as hard as he tries to, he just couldn’t, and the worst thing was, he couldn’t even protect him,
the man who needed him so much that he was asking for him to turn away despite his pain, the man who wanted him to remember only the good about him, the man he loves…

The screeching of the table carried on for a good 30 minutes, it was only after that, that they were released and him, he was asked to clean up Junsu and the mess,

it hurts him, so much that he longed to dig out his heart and let it pump on its own, he would be empty, no doubt, but the pain would be no more.
~*~End~*~
He felt somebody patting his shoulder and he looked up, Changmin, their best friend, Junsu’s doctor.

Slowly, he sniffed and wiped away the reminiscent of the tears. “Yoochun hyung, you have been staying in the hospital ever since Junsu was here, you would die of fatigue sooner or later!”

he smiled weakly at the younger man, indeed, he was tired and drained, he knew how bad he looked, pale face, red eyes, messy hair, but he couldn’t help it, he couldn’t go home when Junsu was lying here all alone.

“hyung knows how to take care of himself, Changmin ah, you just worry about feeding your stomach okay?” he chuckled when he pouted, watching him with tired eyes as he pulled a plastic chair closer to Yoochun and sat down comfortably.

“Why don’t you go back to the association?” Changmin asked quietly, knowing that it was a touchy subject for him, “why don’t you?” Yoochun retorted back,

the younger man sighed tiredly as he stared at his hyung, he couldn’t understand though, what grudges his hyung bear for the association,
though he knew that he probably has a reason, just like him, who refused to work for barbaric people who thinks they were upholding justice.

“You know Changmin?” Yoochun spoke, breaking the tense silence, “I always thought of the association as a family, so it hurts so much to know, that they had to kill my parents just because they did not allow me to choose the path they took years ago, it was a lie, a lie that they were close friends of my parents and their last wish was for me to join the association.”

Yoochun paused, taking in deep breaths to calm his over-driven emotions. Eyeing Changmin, whom was still hanging onto his every words, he laughed and continued,

“I did my best for them, trying so hard to fulfill my parents’ dream, so I did what they told me to do, every single little thing, it was stupid, I don’t even know why they need me so much, not until later, did I know that it was because of my best of the best shooting/combat and hacking skills, they were using me right from the start, they were using the lie to control me, and I was stupid to have listened.”

He tightened his already balled up fists, trying his very best to suppress the anger that was threatening to overspill, he looked down at his feet so that Changmin would not see the tears of anger if they flow down his eyes.

“Then came Junsu, I was assigned to be his “bodyguard” it was love at first sight for me, he was the reason that I had finally managed to accept my sexuality, accept that I am a man who loves my own gender, it was him that made me embrace this truth, something JaeJoong and Yunho hyung was unable to do.”

A smile, only when talking about him would he smiles so genuinely. “I wanted to protect him, I really do, so when the association tried to get me to get him to reveal every single thing that son of a b.itch had done, I was extremely against their decision, it would surely kill Junsu, my Junsu who was so innocent, who shouldn’t be involved in all these shits.”

He wiped away the tears that had finally made their way down, occasionally covering his mouth so that the sobs wouldn’t be heard,

“it’s alright hyung, cry all you want.”

Changmin whispered, his heart twisting into knots seeing how hard his hyung was trying not to appear weak in front of him.

“I wanted to send that old b.astard to jail before Junsu got to know anything, but he, he came back one month after, allowing a stranger to rape his own son.”

There wasn’t any other emotion except for anguish and guilt, Yoochun was suffering inside, and only a few know.

“The association was the most inhumane and coldest place, do get what they want, they were willing to sacrifice anybody that comes their way, I don’t want to be like them Changmin, I don’t want to be a monster.”

Yoochun stroked Junsu’s face lovingly, a deep frown on his handsome face, Changmin had wanted to stay for a little while more, however, his pager beeped, informing him that there was another emergency that he need to attend to,

“go Changmin, now you are a doctor who saves lives, not one who creates lethal medicine to end another’s, I wish you the best of luck Changmin, and don’t ever become like me.”

He closed the door softly, afraid that any noise would disrupt the love in that white horrible room, the fragile love Yoochun was clutching so tightly to.
**********************************************************
Both of you are fools, so what if you end people’s lives? You end it for the sake of justice, so why are you hesitating?

Why are you still standing at the same spot, not moving forward, just staring at the useless man in front of you? You are a fool Park Yoochun, you and all your friends are fools to think that you could escape from fate, from me.

He would never wake up, just accept the truth, reach out your hand and disconnect the machine that was working for his dead body.

Nobody should be hanging on to love, cause this emotion just strip away your everything, this time, Park Yoochun, you would never be able to pass my ultimate obstacle,

you would never be able to prove true love.
*********************************************************
Chapter 5 is up!!! Have to go check out if winglin is accessible. ^^ Comments are appreciated!!!^^

Introduction:

Fate is cruel, there wasn’t a time where it would play his cruel joke on everybody, there wasn’t a time where he would try to separate people, dissecting humans’ weak relationship and making a fool out of them. He never thought it would be the same though, never thought that there would actually be a second evidence to true love…

—————————————————————————————————————————————————

Yoochun placed him back on his bed, it was getting late and he shouldn’t move him around too much.
He sighed as he stared at the beautiful figure, if only he would wake up, if only he was here, counting the stars with him like how they used to, but it was too late, he knew that it would be impossible for a very long time.
He wiped the tears that had flowed down, he had been crying occasionally.

Why? He did not know. But he was tired, his body and soul was drained, sitting on the bed he had borrowed from the hospital, he stared at his beloved and allowed his thoughts to travel back, back to where those nightmares and tears started…
~*~Flashback~*~
“Su, what’s wrong, why are you crying?” Yoochun knelt to the same level as him and pulled him into his embrace, trying to soothe his over flowing tears.

He was confused; shouldn’t Junsu be happy that they were going to spend a month together? Why was he crying?
“Why didn’t you stop him Chun? Why didn’t you stop that bastard?” he allowed Junsu to hit him with his fists as he waited patiently for him to continue, “Tell me what is wrong Su.” He whispered, heart scrunching up to the unknown fear.

“Chunnie, that monster…that monster is out to negotiate the deal of selling me off!” Yoochun felt his body weakens, he should have known, he should have paid more attention to the situation, how that old fox was constantly on the phone, how Junsu would always be mentioned in his conversations.

“What should I do Chun? What can I do now?” he didn’t know either, all he was aware of was the piercing pain in his heart and the cruel truth ringing in his ears. “I don’t know Junsu, I really don’t know.”
~*~End~*~
Yoochun splashed water onto his face, enough was enough, it wouldn’t help the situation by brooding over the past.
He walked out of the bathroom when he heard a soft knock on the door, “How is he?” came the usual line from his friends, he smiled but can’t help feeling bitter when he saw them holding each others’ hands, “no change hyung. How’s your honeymoon.”

Yoochun was glad that at least, among the three of them, he was the only one crying inside, all his life, he only wanted to protect people he love, but that, also prove to be an impossible task, his jaws ached as he listened to their sweet adventure, he really couldn’t bring himself to be happy,

but, seeing them basking in the glow of happiness, his beliefs of true love was renewed, for he was aware, JaeJoong and Yunho were the only ones whom had escaped the unyielding claws of fate, and he was about to do the same.
********************************************
So what if they managed to prove that their love is real? After a few more obstacles, they would eventually fall apart. Don’t you know? I have a plan for all the puppets in this world.
I believed Yoochun, like a fool, I waited for a miracle, I waited for the legendary true love to appear, but each time, it disappoints me, it made me lose hope.
Why put two together to have them separate themselves? I would rather separate them before I had to witness anymore of your so called love.

Don’t be a fool Park Yoochun, love hurts, you know this better than anybody.
*******************************************
Chapter 4 is up, I wanted to post up chapter 5 at winglin, but it’s failing me, I’ll go back and check it out later. Comments are much appreciated. ^^